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Monday 16 May 2022

How Are We? How Are You? How Am I?

The world has been tense for so long and desperate to find that new normal we've been promised... eventually... but I doubt very much that any of us had a war, record inflation, and the rising price of everything in mind. While the pandemic isn't over, it's fading off the news and collectively we are beginning to hold ourselves less tight and as we do, the difficult things we've been avoiding are loosening too and we find ourselves at the edge of overwhelm. I hear it in the conversations around me.  I feel it inside. 

It is so important to take time for yourself and find clarity. The most important relationship is the one you have with yourself. - Diane Von Furstenberg






How are we? How are you? These are good questions. So is... how am I? Checking in with ourselves to see how we're copying can be scary especially when we sense the answers aren't going to be as healthy as we'd like.

I feel fragile. I feel like I can't quite find my feet - like every time I sense a way forward and begin to work in that direction something else beyond of my control happens. It is not about me and yet, it impacts me because the rising cost of everything affects the number of people willing or able to travel to take a workshop like the ones I'd like to teach. That awareness throws into doubt the decisions I'd made to write and to teach and I have to work to remake them. 

I was so grateful to go to the retreat in March and while the workshop itself was fabulous, the very best thing was to leave here and go there. I have another workshop booked in June that I feel like I should be cancelling, just to economize, which is rather strange since the class and the accommodations are already paid for. There's this external pressure in the air that makes me think food and fuel are not a good idea only I have to eat whether I go or stay and that leaves fuel. It's not very far away. The amount is doable. As I debate, I am reminded that if I'm not careful to focus my thinking in positive, self supportive directions, I could easily become the one pushing myself over the edge. This could be true for you too. Are you supporting yourself? What more could you do for you? 

When you say "yes" to others make sure you are not saying "no" to yourself. - Paulo Coelho





Chances are that being creative - making - is a huge part of how you function and that without making you don't function well at all. Are you making? Have you created a routine and an environment in which you can make? Do you have what you need? Could you need what you have?

I don't function well with clutter of any kind, or with overfilled spaces, or with the inability to find things easily. The feeling is sharp. It cuts. It sits on my nerves making me so jittery that I can't think and I can't make. And when I can't make, I can't function which becomes a viscous cycle. The most important room in my home is the studio and my morning hour spent making whatever I want to make for myself is necessary nourishment. 

Our lives are so busy, and for many of us the demands are overwhelming. Some of us focus so much on the needs of others, we lose sight of ourselves. Stop, for one moment. Take a deep breath. Be still. Refocus. Concentrate on improving your life. One situation at a time. You can't be much good to others if you're no good to yourself. - Carlos Wallace
 


Making can't happen when my studio is a mess. It's a gift to myself to stop and clean up. It's also a gift to others in my life who would prefer I wasn't cranky from lack of making. For as long as I can remember, I've controlled the size of my stash by designating space only I'd begun to ooze... into the laundry closet... into the hall closet... into the guest room closet... all over the guest room... and like an open wound, it was raw on my nerves, needing to be bound, needing to come back to one space. As I see and touch, sort and sift, I am grateful for the potential of the stash that I already have and have already paid for.

When you recover or discover something that nourishes your soul and brings joy, care enough about yourself to make room for it in your life. - Jean Shinoda Bolen




Above all, be the heroine of your life, not the victim. - Nora Ephron




What are you working on in your studio? For me, having a project, and especially a long term engaging project, keeps me moving forward. I know what I'm going to do next, my brain is happily thinking over the scenarios, and that calm confidence balances the unknowns - what I can control versus what is out of my control.  

A few weeks ago, I mentioned that I'm writing a book about bags. I was somewhat hesitant to say that out loud. It felt like for the millionth time, I was stopping this and starting that - more shifting - a tremendous amount of shifting. Would you think I was unstable and unfocused? Would you believe me? Would you support me? I really don't know and it's okay. 

What I do know is that writing this book is my engaging project and while how I present it may be fine-tuned to accommodate the reality of the rising cost of everything, it is all right, right now. So right that I shifted supplies around putting the less frequently used ones away and making the bag ones more visible and easily accessed. I keep moving forward in spite of the tension, the fragility. 

One person's self care isn't necessarily another's - there is going to be a lot of individuality. - Gail Saltz, MD





The challenge is not to be perfect - it is to be whole. - Jane Fonda




My birthday is in just under three weeks. The Year of Turning Sixty is coming to an end and soon I will actually be sixty and living the first year of a new decade. I was told that time sped up as you aged and I am finding it to be true. In that truth, there is a determination to make the most of life, to be on my path, living my best life joyfully, abundantly, with growing creativity, and with ever increasing holistic health. You can't do that without upsetting some people, even people you care about, but you can't survive, and thrive, and blossom in any other way. 

If you want to live an authentic, meaningful life, you need to master the art of disappointing and upsetting others, hurting feelings, and living with the reality that some people just won't like you. It might not be easy, but it's essential if you want your life to reflect your deepest desires, values, and needs. - Cheryl Richardson.

How are we? How are you? How am I? What and who are you saying no to so you can say yes to yourself? Are you making? If yes, what engaging project are you working on? If no, when will you start making? Are you taking your creative vitamins? I really hope so. 

Talk soon -  Myrna

Grateful -
Yesterday I was clever, so I wanted to change the world. Today I am wise, so I am changing myself. - Rumi

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