Whine Snap & Complain

Since there's no point, I won't complain and - to be fair - I must say that the women I'm working with are doing their absolute best not to whine, snap, and complain even though we're all quite frustrated. This move is so unbelievably disorganized. We have shifted awkward and heavy boxes and bags across and then back across the store while management keeps making and then re-making decisions. There doesn't seem to be a cohesive plan although - to be fair again - things are - finally - starting to come together. We're all trying to remain on the bright side.

Last night, as we were leaving, we were asked to be prepared to work long hours - as in twelve or more per day - over the next week. No. I don't think so. Even if I wasn't totally exhausted, I'm not willing to do that in an unorganized environment. I don't mind working hard when the work is organized and efficient. I mind when my time and energy are not well utilized. It will be such a relief when things are in place and my work life returns to normal.

Last Friday, I asked my boss if she was happy with my work. Even though my probationary period is still another month and the timing was bad, I needed to know because there was a job posting that I should apply for if my services were not wanted any longer. She was happy to have me stay and I was happy to stay. This is good.

The job posting is one that I thought I wanted. It's Monday to Friday days, on-call, with the ability to book time off as wanted and involves delivering temporary secretarial services to various departments at the university. The pay is over double what I'm currently earning. It's a fabulous job and up until a few months ago, I would have jumped at the opportunity only I've realized that I prefer NOT being the boss and NOT dealing with a constantly evolving work environment - at least right now. With my job, I show up, do the work well, spend the day talking about my favourite subject, and go home. After that, my life is my own. This is perfect - for now. Perhaps in time, I'll want to apply for that job. We'll see.

gwensews wrote - I wonder if some of your thoughts came from the Happiness book you're reading?

The Happiness Project is a memoir of one year in Gretchen Rubin's life during which she explored different avenues to increased happiness. She wasn't unhappy when she started the year. She simply wanted to know if it was possible - and how - to be even happier. It's not a how to book although it will certainly make you think and, as a result, act. It's a book that I wish I had read twenty years go and it's a book that I'll want to read again twenty years from now. Perhaps every ten years as I have with Wishcraft.

One thing I particularly like about the book is Gretchen's complete honesty. She doesn't march to a typical drummer and that's something she's had to come to terms with. I don't march to a typical drummer either. It's something I've had to come to terms with.

What I find fun, others do not. What others find fun, I do not. As I age, I've found that my atypicalness has company. It's somewhat comforting. I'm reading the book in bits and pieces because each chapter focuses on a different aspect of happiness that Gretchen wanted to work on. As I read, I'm giving that area in my life a lot of thought.

Most of my areas would be similar to Gretchen's although I might approach them in different ways. For example, she has young children while I am about to have three adult children. It's a different perspective while the question of how to interact with my children remains the same. I knew before I started reading the book that while I wasn't unhappy, I was also not as happy as I could be. I felt I was in a holding pattern that needed a shift. The book is clarifying some thoughts and providing others. I like that.

gwensews also wrote - Cooking for me and DH would be a nightmare. I'm a vegetarian on a diet and he's on a heart and diabetic diet!

LOL - with all my allergies, I don't think cooking for me is a picnic and yet Lori (my friend's friend) is INCREDIBLY happy to have been asked. She thinks it's a fabulous challenge. I think it's a fabulous learning opportunity. I'm looking forward to acquiring a better understanding of food through the combination of eating the dishes and reading the recipes. Hopefully, it will tickle a few creative thoughts, enough to get me through the summer because I imagine by September I'll be desperate to have her back again.

Rose wrote - I think that happiness has a lot to do with sorting out priorities.

Corinne wrote - I also believe this is an ongoing process that needs to be reevaluated and readjusted periodically.

I so agree. I have said for years that I'd take a cook over a housekeeper so I'm not surprised at the conclusion I came to however, in all those years, I never did anything about it - until now. Is it my age? Is it that I'm working outside the home again? Is it the age of my children? Is it my allergies? Is it the book? Who knows. Certainly some of it is a result of the book and that's just fine. Whatever it is, it's a time of growth and change. That's important to a vibrant life.

The ah ha about unique clothing and having my nails done is definitely a result of the book. Gretchen's thoughts made me realize how often I deny myself something that would give me pleasure because of the expense. I know some of the contributing factors and where that feeling is rooted. Thankfully, it's not in my self worth. This is good. Knowing that I'm worth whatever it is that I want to invest in will help me to determine where to invest. It's exciting to think of the possibilities.

I'm off to work today and then again on Friday. I have Wednesday, Thursday, and Saturday off and don't know about Sunday yet and I may be asked to work more hours based on last night's conversation. I imagine by Friday the store will be in much better shape and we'll mostly be filling shelves and not pushing things around any more - I hope.

Talk soon - Myrna

Grateful - Lori's willingness to cook for us and her (hopefully contagious) excitement