In 2012...

Thinking back, I've never lived a month like December 2011 where I had just the right combination of time and space and responsibility to move slow for an extended period. It was filled with aspects of life that are important to me - faith, family, and friends - celebration, individuality, and creativity - and allowed me to shift my thinking and actions in a far more positive direction. In 2012, I want to let go of - or re-frame - those things that attempt to drag me down and instead continue to move forward.

On Christmas Eve, I started this re-knitting project chosen for its easy to knit in public attributes and its potential attractiveness and wearability. In my size, you start by casting on 122 stitches, knitting, decreasing 24 stitches, knitting, increasing twelve stitches on each side, knitting, decreasing twelve stitches on each side, knitting, increasing twenty-four stitches, folding in half to pick up the original 122 stitches while decreasing needle size and knitting in the round, increasing sixty stitches, knitting, increasing eighty stitches, knitting, increasing another eighty stitches, knitting, and - finally - casting off 456 stitches. I'm two steps from finished and it's a long and multi-stitched ending that is taking more yarn and more time than I'd anticipated. Life's like that. It ebbs and flows and moves in ways you hadn't thought of or planned for. In 2012, I want to ebb and flow with life more gracefully, to live in expectation rather than impatience, to live in the here and the now rather than the past or the future.

The yarn is a hand dyed, bamboo blend combined with a plain black acrylic. The bamboo blend was knit once before in a project that failed because the dye lots of the three skeins were not identical as advertised. The black and bamboo combination was knit once before in a shawl pattern that failed because it did not wrap around my body in any kind of flattering composition. If this finished project fails, it is neither the pattern's nor the yarn's fault but simply because I could not try the bolero on before I knit it and took a risk and that's okay. In 2012, I want to continue to risk and to recycle projects that don't work into projects that do. I've learned that what at first appears to be a  mistake - even a costly mistake - is often a heavily disguised learning opportunity and the pathway to a favourite garment. That's an attitude that is transferable to many areas of life. In 2012, I want to transfer it more often.

The pattern is Drops 110-28 from Garn Studio, an entire website of free knitting patterns. Because the patterns are free, it's easy to print off more than I need, park them in the knitting cupboard, and forget that they exist while continuing to stash. Free is similar to on sale. In the past, I've set all kinds of rules around buying and stashing and for the most part I haven't lived up to those rules because in reality having a stash - whether it's knitting patterns, sewing patterns, yarn, or fabric - doesn't bother me in the least. The possibilities, colors, and textures of my stash are as delightful to me as the paintings, throw cushions, and accessories in my living room. They are an integral part of how I live and it's only when my stash exceeds designated space that it stops pleasing me and starts sitting on my nerves. In 2012, I want to remain aware of positive possibilities and of the edge of possibility so that my stash - and my life choices - continue to nurture me and my creativity. All things work together.

Nurturing creativity is all about asking what if and how can I and less about following the pattern as written, a method that I refer to as paint by number. The first version of this tablecloth skirt followed the pattern exactly. With the second version, I asked how can I adapt this pattern to flatter my figure and made some changes to the shapes. With the third version, I sewed those changes in another fabric and concluded that as gorgeous as this skirt is on some people, it isn't a design that works for me. As I start a new business, I'm experiencing external pressure around the way things "should" be done. I like to blog. I'm not interested in Twitter, Facebook, or Linked-In. What's in style or on trend is not as important as the colors and design aspects that intrigue me. I'm not interested in craft fairs. I love galleries. In 2012, I want to continue to walk my path and increasingly let go of others expectations and should lists as there's no point to living someone else's life when I have my own skills, talents, and purpose to embrace.

Above are some of my goals for 2012. It's not a complete list and they're not concrete goals like lose thirty-five pounds. They're life style choices that once assimilated into daily living have every possibility of being sustained. While I also have goals around living holistically that have to do with spirituality, relationships, emotions, finances, and health, in considering those goals I'm looking carefully at what can be sustained. Why set a goal to walk five miles a day or cook six times a week when those actions are not likely to happen for any length of time if even past the point of pen to paper? Because life ebbs and flows, goals need to be flexible even as they provide guidance and direction. It's that guidance - the moving forward in positive directions - that I want to achieve in 2012 as opposed to checking off any boxes even if - LOL - I'd be happy to lose thirty-five pounds. I'll settle for less jiggling.

In 2012, I want to thoroughly enjoy life. It comes with no guarantees and this moment is all I have.

Talk soon - Myrna

Grateful - new beginnings

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Personal Growth - Really, creating based purely on whim and passion is my joy and has served me well so far; so I shall continue wandering aimlessly but happily through the process of making, seizing the inspiration wherever it hits, perfecting techniques as much as I am able, and just seeing what pops up... - Carolyn

I tried several sew alongs this past year including my own Self Imposed Sewing Club and didn't finish any outline begun. Carolyn's approach has been far more successful for me in the past than any rules. That's something to pay attention to especially when it's equally true that I am a more disciplined than whim driven person. In 2012, I intend to wander more. Some lack of structure in my life will not be a bad thing.